Hey there.

Pit Viper Dudes and Dudettes,
When I saw your job posting, Wayne Campbell's words popped into my brain, "It will be mine, oh yes, it will be mine." After spending some time figuring out how to wrap me up into a letter and resume, I decided to show you by collecting some creative evidence. So for my first trick, my cover letter. 
 

Barb 4 Creative Director
by: Barb
Pit Vipers excite me, and I'm not the only one. 
You see pits out in the wild, YOU KNOW THEY ARE FUN. 
Pit Viper makes glasses that are all the rage,
I've seen them on grannies and babies, it don't matter the age.
Do you think it's just glasses? HA! You're in for a treat.
There are hats, shirts, bibs, and even SOCKS FOR YOUR FEET!
I know about websites and built one at work.
At my next job, I can still do that, and also want to twerk.
Though my dance moves are impressive, you'll be surprised to know
my people skills are stronger and it will really show.
Don't take my word for it, just ask my bosses what they think.
I love those dudes, and I'll put it in ink. 
I'm not afraid to say it, I'll make a great addition.
Working with me is better than the missionary position. 
Writing emails, or letters, or pigeons...
By working together we'll achieve all the visions!
If I spot a problem, I'll make it all better.
A little bit of spit, will make it just enough wetter.
Being a dreamer, a doer, and a bit idealistic
makes for the best ideas to become realistic.
 
We haven't met yet, but when we do, 
you will be sure to feel these good vibes too.
Just the thought of all of this is making me hyper,
I CAN'T FREAKING WAIT, BARB 4 PIT VIPER.
(Creative Director)
 
Much Love,
Barb